> dispassionate discussion of how different language features impact code quality

I think we can start disagreeing here.

The metrics shouldn't be solely code quality, but also simplicity, readability, and how fast you can express yourself in it.

Code quality will go up the more language friction you add: types, "one way" of doing things, and function-oriented programming. Same code in a language with heavy types and strict functions will be of course "more solid". However, it will take 10x the time to write, be less flexible, and harder to understand.