Why is abstinence "not living" but drinking is?
I'm not really anti drug or alcohol, but I am absolutely anti "substance use is the only way to truly live", even in moderation
I spent my twenties drinking moderately, and I barely drink at all in my 30s. I don't miss it even a bit and I'm way more alive now than I was then.
Whether you drink is probably irrelevant to why you feel more alive. Life experience opens up a ton of opportunities.
I guess if you enjoy drinking, and would miss it in its absence, then you can call it "not living"