What would zapping a satellite with a laser achieve? I suppose if you get it hot enough to melt everything, without anything flying off, then it would turn into a spherical drop of molten scrap... but then what?
I assume the poster means to change its trajectory.
You ablate part of it on the prograde side to create a small retrograde thrust which will deorbit it.
I think the right move is to merge this approach with goo blobs. We launch a large goo blobs or nets into a few strategic geostationary orbits and now you only have to ablate objects so they hit the goo then deorbit the goo once it is full (or just leave it there) as they would be large known orbits.