> I want a dumb watch with vibration notifications.

Same. Notifications are rarely time-critical. A few years ago I noticed that I kept getting distracted by my phone alerting to some nonsense which really didn't matter, so I completely disabled all notifications. I'll just look at it once every few hours to respond to incoming messages.

A regular smart watch would be pretty pointless for me. Getting stuff like message notifications on my wrist would be a huge anti-feature. However, it would be pretty nice to have a convenient way to set an alarm, which will vibrate on my wrist when it goes off. I want a "leave now to catch the bus" reminder, or a "it's time to take a break" reminder! That's all, nothing more, no need to add any fancy sensors.