I was there, Gandalf, 15 years ago. I think the last virus I saw in person was closer to 25 years ago, but I've done my time in the trenches.
Locked-down app stores certainly have significant utility and even should maybe be the default depending on the device, but calling people "assholes" for asking for an escape hatch is extremely odd.
Let them use the hardware they want. Why does their ideology have to infect my device?
I want a platform with no escape hatches. Yet they are intent of making this impossible for me.
When I want open hardware, I have many options.