Nobody has ever had this confusion about the access time of hash tables except maybe in the introductory class. What you’re describing is the same reasoning as any data structure. Which is correct. Physical memory hierarchies are a data structure. Literally.
I’m confused by GP’s confusion.
This is completely false. All regularly cited algorithm complexity classes are based on estimating a memory access as an O(1) operation. For example, if you model memory access as O(N^1/3), linear search worse case is not O(N), it is O(N^4/3): in the worse case you have to make N memory accesses and N comparisons, and if each memory access in N^1/3 time, this requires N^4/3 + N time, which is O(N^4/3).