I built a go caldav server and client for my task management app (http://calmtasks.com) and had a similar experience, which surprised me. Go generally has at least one good, working, and well documented implementation for all standard protocols.

Apple calendar supports caldav but in a way not specified in the spec. I basically had to send requests and responses to figure out how it works. I would be willing to open source my server and client (alot of which was built using/on top of existing libraries) if there is interest.