I use Arc-Dark with elementary-xfce-dark icons (but have a script to switch to toggle dark-mode, where light mode is Adwaita with elementary-xfce icons).

TBH I typically run things fullscreen, so the only part of xfce I normally "see" is a thin task bar at the bottom with open windows and clock and such. Well, except for when I use Thunar, which is a nice enough file manager.