alt Hacker News> Attend every week.
In my experience, this is the key. “90% of life is showing up.” If you are around the same people every week, for whatever reason, with even a minimal amount of openness and friendliness, you will get community.
Replies
pmg101 • 01/16/2026
I'm open and friendly to everyone I meet but get treated like a weirdo and ostracized (I am also a weirdo).
You don't only have to be "open and friendly", you have to say the correct things in the correct way in the correct order in order for people to accept you.
Exactly. It can take a month or more but the secret for me is to “become a regular” at places I like.