That's funny, but let's make it more plausible and less-sci-fish-ly satirical :)

Proposal: Using Trained Carrier Pigeons as Emergency Data Relays

Objective Create a simple, low-tech way to move digital messages across a large area when internet, radio, and phone networks are completely blocked.

Core Idea Pigeons carry small memory cards with the messages from one station to the next, like a chain of human couriers but using birds.

Steps to Set Up

1. Build small pigeon lofts (homes) at key locations across the area (e.g., every 50–100 km). 2. Train homing pigeons to fly reliably between each pair of nearby lofts (standard pigeon training methods). 3. At each loft, install a simple automatic device that: - Reads data from a memory card the arriving pigeon carries - Copies the data to a new memory card - Attaches the new card to an outgoing pigeon 4. Attach a tiny, lightweight memory card (e.g., microSD in a small protective tube) to each pigeon’s leg. 5. People at the starting point load their digital messages (text, small files) onto the card and send the pigeon. 6. Pigeons fly to the next loft → data is copied → next pigeon flies onward → repeat until the final destination.

Basic Protocol Rules - Each message gets a clear label (e.g., “To: City B, From: City A, Priority: High”). - Stations check cards daily and send pigeons in both directions when possible. - Use only trained, healthy pigeons; rest them between flights. - Protect cards from water and impact with a small, sealed case.

Realistic Performance - Speed: Hours to several days per hop, depending on distance and weather. - Capacity: One 256 GB card can carry thousands of text messages or a few large files. - Reliability: Works in no-power situations; depends on pigeon health and weather.

Damage Control -Add cyanide to the chip in case the pigeon gets captured.

This is a proven concept (used in wars before radio) updated with modern tiny storage.

AI Agents can be fun, at times :)