As TFA points out at the beginning, it's not so simple if you want to use the GPU.

The "just" is doing a lot of heavylifting here (as detailed in the article), especially for anything that's not a trivial cmdline tool.

We had a time when static binaries where pretty much the only thing we had available.

Here is an idea, lets go back to pure UNIX distros using static binaries with OS IPC for any kind of application dynamism, I bet it will work out great, after all it did for several years.

Got to put that RAM to use.