Ian Duncan, I was imagining you on a stage delivering this as a standup comedy show on Netflix.
My pet peeve with Github Actions was that if I want to do simple things like make a "release", I have to Google for and install packages from internet randos. Yes, it is possible this rando1234 is a founding github employee and it is all safe. But why does something so basic need external JS? packages?
Yeah, their "standard library" so to speak (basically everything under the actions org) is lacking. But for this specifically, you can use the gh CLI.