that is one of the most pretentious things ive ever read
Perhaps you mean that as an insult, but IMHO that's what makes it funny.
Some of the references regional or are dated, since it is from 10 years ago.
Yes, it is, and that's the irony, making it meta, which makes it the very kind of pretentious bullshit it is critiquing, which makes it brilliant, which also makes it bullshit, which is amusing. It's great satire.
A version of this I've experienced before is when someone's trying to "pill" you on some ideology that you've already examined and tossed aside. They keep trying to educate you on it. Like the problem is you don't get it. You can't even get across that no, in fact, you do get it, and you don't accept it.
It also requires some ideological bubble where people care too much what other people know and think. Otherwise someone would never bother that kind of an educational talk with a stranger.