> I find it somewhat offensive that I am lying and/or unprofessional about this.

It's an extraordinary claim, which usually would require extraordinary proof. I've also worked in UK healthcare, albeit in a patient-facing role rather than a back-office or technician role.

The whole process would raise so many questions.

    > "You can easily misplace a notepad, but its hard to lose your labcoat"

Surely if notes were taken on a labcoat, these would then have to be copied into a more permanent form? As you've said, the coats are washed, which makes the coat a very short-term data-storage device.

I have a whole bunch of white t-shirts, and wear a white t-shirt pretty much every day. It's never once occurred to me to write an appointment-time, a phone number, or a shopping-list on my t-shirt.