I have talked to colleagues who wrote software running on microcontrollers a decade ago, that software still runs fine. So yes there is set and forget software. And it is all around us, mostly in microcontrollers. But microcontrollers far outnumber classical computers (trivially: each classical computer or phone contain many microcontrollers such as SSD controllers, power management, wifi, ethernet, cellular,... And then you can add appliances, cars etc to that).
If something in software works and isn't internet connected it really is set and forget. And far too many things are being connected needlessly these days. I don't need or want an online washing machine or car.
Ignoring the actual useful reasons to connect something to be internet, the subscription business model is just too damn tempting.
True, using a library in a cheap coffee maker you can maybe set it and forget it. I have an old TI-85 calculator that’s never needed to update its OS, while Apple has obsoleted multiple generations of applications in its never ending upgrade cycle.
But for mission critical applications the bar is a little higher. Isn’t this why we have the ongoing dialogue about OTA updates for Teslas etc and the pros and cons of that approach? Because if you can’t OTA patch a bug, you have to issue a recall [0]. But if you have internet connectivity, as you rightly point out, then you have a whole new attack surface to consider.
I just don’t think it’s all that simple.
[0]: https://www.cbsnews.com/amp/news/ford-recall-lincoln-explore...