I desperately miss the 90's and the middle class we used to have. I also miss basic cheap eats. If someone tried to make an authentic type of diner today, it would immediately become swamped with influencers.

How can I get away from all this? Is there a town somewhere where everyone is over 45 and there is no cell service and a full meal is $5?

Heck I would settle for a small NorCal town that doesn't have gangs or meth.

I suspect that people want a theoretical cheap, simple meal, but what makes things cheap now is less the simplicity of ingredients, but really lowering the labour effort. So, something like the free breakfast at a cheap motel: bulk egg mixture, sausages that might as well be 50% cardboard pulp, big tubs of factory waffle batter, churned out onto disposable plates. Unless that's exactly what you have in mind, of course!

I’ve got a place by me that does 2 eggs, 2 pancakes (or French toast), 2 sausages and toast for $4 before 8 AM.

And I don’t go there. The spots that get twice (or more) as much for that meal really are quite a bit better. And their coffee is truly foul. Classic diner coffee is fine, but if I’ve had better coffee on an airplane I’m not prone to going back.

Tastes have changed and I think people have been highly exposed to tastier dishes.

There's also the "Denny's" problem. Classic diners tend to be pretty much the same as a Denny's in terms of quality.

Waffle House is your jam.

Only in the southern US unfortunately

IHOP and Denny's fit that. They're quiet about the value menu.

Especially today. I used to go to a place where every time I ate, my wife would roll her eyes as I talked about how good the prices were. Even they’re expensive now. Still cheaper, but damn. I don’t eat out nearly as much anymore. It’s sad. Diners are my favorite.