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sdenton4yesterday at 10:49 PM6 repliesview on HN

I fail to recall the exact wording of the discussion topics, but they were, in fact, non-technical — covering such lovely topics as the hardest day of my life, my biggest life challenges, and other similar “trauma-baiting” questions.

Ha, I don't think anyone who asks these questions expects that you'll respond in a fully unfiltered way... These kinds of questions are part and parcel of non-tech interview processes.

You can redirect with some subtlety "Well, my hardest ever day at work was..." to avoid talking about dead babies or whatever. Your interviewer doesn't get to look over your whole life history and determine whether your /truthfully/ chose the actual hardest ever day. So really it's a chance for you to say "Here's a [big] challenge I once faced, and here's how I survived/overcame it."


Replies

rsotoyesterday at 11:19 PM

Yeah, OP just unwinded himself, no filter. You can be truthful and open with friends and family, close people to you. You absolutely shouldn't when talking with strangers.

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freehorsetoday at 12:09 AM

But why ask about "the hardest day in your life" instead eg "the hardest day at work"?

Personally asking this kind of personal questions sounds very weird. You can evaluate soft skills and culture fit by asking more relevant, professional questions. Except if the reason to ask this kind of more personal questions was sth else.

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johnfntoday at 12:03 AM

You are technically correct. But you must admit it sounds pretty bad to say "Yeah, the idea of the behavioral technical interview is the interviewer asks questions that look like they admit honest answers, but you should actually lie to them, and they expect you to lie, and actually it's a charade you play with your interviewer, and if you don't understand this (which is never explained to you) then you will immediately be rejected."

I can definitely understand the perspective of someone who has done few interviews not understanding this and being upset/confused!

nsvd2yesterday at 11:14 PM

In fact, being able to "play the game" so to speak is probably part of what the interviewer is looking for.

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staredtoday at 12:06 AM

If they ask questions but expect fake, censored or cherry-picked answers, it says a lot about their culture.

Pro tip (for life, not only interviewing): never ask a question you don’t want to hear answer to.

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