To get a job at our company take three pills of brainOzempic every day to maximize productivity.
We have our NeuroLinkBrain Implant plugin to AI agent , so that you can vibe code 24/7 . To maximize shareholder value.
You don’t look like a cultural fit to our company, but try a course of Ozempic and reapply in 6 months.
Probs already there…
People say "narcolepsy this" and "ADHD that" but we know y'all need off these drugs.
I know you're joking but I saw a company that had similar policies like fasting and stuff like that to improve productivity. They seemed to take it pretty seriously...
I reckon I'll buy some landscaping machinery and a truck before I ever sign up for that distopian nightmare. At least sound ordinance would prevent 24/7 operation.