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o2359 • yesterday at 8:31 PM • 5 replies • view on HN

Have you ever lived in a red state? In a rural area? "Never apologize, especially when you know you're wrong" is a foundational principle in many cultures and households.


Replies

Loughla • yesterday at 9:43 PM

I live in a very rural area, and most people are sort of overly apologetic about their mistakes. The ones that refuse to acknowledge their mistakes or apologize are what we call "assholes".

In a rural community, being labeled as an asshole has real repercussions. A neighbor down the road is moving away because of this. He called the cops on a guy who was trying to catch some horses that got out of their pen when the man looking for his horses pulled into his driveway to then back out and turn around. The place he bought was my neighbor's grandpa's farm. There was an old barn with a wooden door inside that my neighbor asked to buy from him (his grandpa had carved his and the grandma's initials on it when they were dating). So the asshole said sure, for $25k. When my neighbor said no, the asshole burned the door. He's an asshole, and because of that nobody would help him when he needed help with his crops because his combine died.

Now he's leaving. Community is important when there's not much of it around.

But I digress. I'm not sure geography or politics has anything to do with emotional maturity.

runjake • yesterday at 8:54 PM

I live in a rural area in a red state and it's quite the opposite. People are perhaps maybe a bit too apologetic. I think the unwillingness to apologize or acknowledge oneself as wrong is a symptom of emotional immaturity rather than political persuasion.

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someguyiguess • yesterday at 10:00 PM

This is the mantra of blue cities too.

asveikau • yesterday at 9:08 PM

This attitude is also very common for law enforcement or prosecutors.

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drivingmenuts • yesterday at 9:08 PM

As is throwing your wife under the bus when you get challenged.